Howz...

Being a software engineer, the one question that you should never ask another software engineer is.. "Howz your job"... The reply that you get will make your life seem pathetic atleast for the next copule of weeks... You get only three types of response to this absolutely worthless question...

1) If the other guy is in a real good mood... he would simply ignore that question and act as if you never asked that dumb question at all... and he would start talking about some new bloke in his company and how he impressed her with all his fundoo fundas...(Ofcourse the girl and the situation everything happens in Utopia)... And the way he narrates will make you forget the question that you asked and you too start narrating your episode of the utopian romance... and oh boy... any software engineer would easily win the Oscar for best screenplay when it comes to utopian romance...

2) If the other guy is just waiting for his due promotion and has his lead's word that he is sure to get a promotion... then beware... he might make your life miserable by narrating how his PM is the best in the world... how he makes him feel comfortable...(By this time you start feeling a bit uncomfortable...) and how he is made to work in cutting edge bull%^$#s...(does bull%^$#s have edges??... mm interesting...) and how he is being respected in the team... and how he was made the offshore lead...(well in reality he wud be in a team maintaining the worlds dumbest software, for a dumb company that pays 100 times the original price of the software to maintain it...leading an offshore team with only him as the team member...) and at the end of the day he will make you feel that you are the lone guy in the universe workin in some worthless shit and totally dissatisfied with your work...and everybody around you are happy and totally satisfied with wat they do... In such a situation you should keep your heart strong... And do remember to call the same guy after the day of his appraisal... you sure will here some words of consolation and some words of wisdom...

3) The third response comes only when the other guy's mind is totally stable... all you hear will be crib...crib...crib... and then after a small break... some more fresh hot cribs... This is the time you should turn philosophical... tell him some filmi dialogues like how to see the positive side of everthin (Like proteins in shit...) and how to wait for the light at the end of the tunnell (well that is the headlight of a express train dumbo!!!) And then you start discussing about getting into some new business like fast food chain... and making some cool fast money... etc etc... until the other guy says he is tired and needs to sleep...


By far the best replies are 1 and 2.... and if you are luck is real bad on that fateful day then you wud get the response no 2...

Hey did i tell you how satisfied i am with my current job... man they treat me like the most important guy in the project... they wait for my consent before takin any major decisions...(well this is the part where you should stop reading this blog...) And my manager promised me that i will get my due promotion and the next Employee of the millenium award... I should be real lucky to work in such a company... and blessed by all the angels to be a part of this great team... under a worldclass leader...(are you still reading???!!! are you crazy???)

"Look at my work!!! O ye Mighties!!! and live in Despair!!!"